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| (txtr1) : | Sex is like Nike, just do it. |
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| (txtr1) : | sorry im busy today cant come over |
| (txtr2) : | we are looking at photos of the tranny joe accidentally kissed last night | | (txtr1) : | be there in five | |
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| (txtr1) : | every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y. |
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| (txtr1) : | aaarrghh i hate her. she text me saying Come on over, there's nobody home |
| (txtr2) : | whats wrong with that - your in? | | (txtr1) : | i went over, and no one was home | |
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| (txtr1) : | First the Dodo died. Then Di died, then Dodi died. Dido must be shitting herself |
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| (txtr1) : | Was it cool? |
| (txtr2) : | About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon. | |
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| (txtr1) : | I've used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead. |
| (txtr2) : | you are fired | |
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| (txtr1) : | does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app? |
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| (txtr1) : | omg omg kill me now. my dress was too short, he saw a string hanging out of it and tugged on it |
| (txtr2) : | so? | | (txtr1) : | tampon. | |
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| (txtr1) : | why does cargo go by ship and shipment go by car? |
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| (txtr1) : | we are at Homebase looking for men |
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| (txtr1) : | Ewww dont you hate it when you pick your dog up and you finger his asshole by accident |
| (txtr2) : | Some things we keep to ourselves Will | |
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| (txtr1) : | im 26 years old |
| (txtr2) : | wow your old | | (txtr1) : | really? | | (txtr2) : | nahh im just messing with you, im outside let me in :) | |
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| (txtr1) : | i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure. |
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| (txtr1) : | i woke up butt naked, with a dead cow next to me!! Man i must have fucked her hard last night |
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