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Good day texts of all time
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| (txtr1) : | he said he didn't have a condom |
| (txtr2) : | and you said? | | (txtr1) : | that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yep - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that | |
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| (txtr1) : | i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"... |
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| (txtr1) : | just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will. |
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| (txtr1) : | I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart |
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| (txtr1) : | NINJA SNEAK ATTACK TEXT! |
| (txtr2) : | NINJA TEXT BLOCK SKILZ!!! | | (txtr1) : | SHURIKAN TEXT! | | (txtr2) : | what ever... nuclear bomb text so i win! | |
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| (txtr1) : | is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero? |
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| (txtr1) : | i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"... |
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| (txtr1) : | you used shower gel as lube? |
| (txtr2) : | yeah dont recommend it. although my dick does kinda shine now | |
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| (txtr1) : | fuck facebook |
| (txtr2) : | in the face! | |
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| (txtr1) : | When I first met him I didn't like him that much but I went to his house anyway. Then I saw his sister and almost had an orgasm. I think I'll be going there again, he doesn't have to know I'm bisexual ;) |
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| (txtr1) : | If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public. |
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| (txtr1) : | you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator |
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| (txtr1) : | i just puked on a traffic warden |
| (txtr2) : | ten points, you gota get a reality tv star to be in my league | |
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| (txtr1) : | Yes, I have been wrong before, but only ONCE. I thought I made a mistake but I hadn't. |
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| (txtr1) : | peed while drinking, scratch it off the list |
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