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last October 2009
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| (txtr1) : | Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes older men...Sorry |
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| (txtr1) : | i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!! |
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| (txtr1) : | every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y. |
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| (txtr1) : | Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches... |
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| (txtr1) : | how do we leave politely? |
| (txtr2) : | Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke. | |
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| (txtr1) : | and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening |
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| (txtr1) : | i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it. |
| (txtr2) : | she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her. | | (txtr1) : | are you serious? | |
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| (txtr1) : | tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too. |
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| (txtr1) : | i woke up butt naked, with a dead cow next to me!! Man i must have fucked her hard last night |
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| (txtr1) : | i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there |
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| (txtr1) : | sorry im busy today cant come over |
| (txtr2) : | we are looking at photos of the tranny joe accidentally kissed last night | | (txtr1) : | be there in five | |
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| (txtr1) : | I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that? |
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| (txtr1) : | we are at Homebase looking for men |
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| (txtr1) : | i dont know whats so great about being respectable. |
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| (txtr1) : | just because im blond doesnt mean im stupid. |
| (txtr2) : | blonde | |
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